What words are legally required at a wedding?

It depends on the country. In England and Wales, two sentences set by the Marriage Act 1949 must be spoken. In most of the United States no particular form is required at all — New York's statute says so explicitly — but the couple must declare their consent in front of the officiant and the required witnesses.

Can we have a wedding with no religious content at all?

In a civil ceremony, yes, and in England and Wales you must: the law prohibits religious content in a civil marriage, including hymns and readings from scripture. That restriction runs the other way from what most couples expect — it is the civil ceremony that is policed, not the religious one.

What do you say at a courthouse wedding?

Usually very little. The officiant asks whether you take each other, you answer, and it is done. Most courthouse and register-office slots are booked in ten- or fifteen-minute blocks, so bring a short vow if you want one and expect anything long to be trimmed.

Are humanist weddings legally binding?

In Scotland and Northern Ireland, yes. In England and Wales, as of August 2026, they are not — a couple marrying humanistically there still registers the marriage separately at a register office. The UK Government announced in October 2025 that it intends to recognise them as part of wider marriage reform, but the law has not yet changed.

What can we say instead of “till death do us part”?

“For as long as we both shall live” is the standard secular substitute and keeps the same weight. “For all the days of my life” and “for the rest of my life” both work. Avoid open-ended phrasing like “for as long as our love lasts” unless you mean it — guests hear the difference immediately.

Non-religious wedding vows, and the legal minimum

Most couples planning a secular ceremony start by asking what they are allowed to say. The more useful question is what they are required to say — and in most places it is far less than they expect. That comes first below; the vow texts follow.

What the law actually requires

Check this before you write anything. Legal position stated as at August 2026; marriage law in England and Wales is currently under review.

England and Wales — the two required sentences

Marriage Act 1949, section 44

I do solemnly declare that I know not of any lawful impediment why I, AB, may not be joined in matrimony to CD.

I call upon these persons here present to witness that I, AB, do take thee, CD, to be my lawful wedded wife.

These must be spoken aloud and the registrar will not allow them to be cut. Shortened alternatives are permitted: “I declare that I know of no legal reason why I [name] may not be joined in marriage to [name],” or answering “I am” to the question “Are you [name] free lawfully to marry [name]?” — and for the second sentence, “I [name] take you [name] to be my wedded wife.” Anything else you say is in addition.

United States — usually no prescribed words at all

New York Domestic Relations Law, section 12

No particular form or ceremony is required when a marriage is solemnized, but the parties must solemnly declare in the presence of a clergyman, magistrate or one-day marriage officiant and the attending witness or witnesses that they take each other as spouses.

Quoted because it states the general American position unusually plainly. Requirements are set state by state: most prescribe no form of words but do require the couple to declare their consent before an authorised officiant and the required witnesses. Confirm with the county clerk who issues your licence, not with a wedding website.

Scotland — two declarations, no fixed formula

Marriage (Scotland) Act 1977

The declarations are of no impediment, and of mutual consent, made before the celebrant and two witnesses.

Scots law requires the couple to declare that they know of no legal impediment to the marriage, and to declare their mutual consent by accepting each other as spouses. It does not prescribe a single sentence in the way the English Act does, and the registrar or celebrant will supply the wording used.

Humanist ceremonies

Legal status as at August 2026

Scotland: legally binding. Northern Ireland: legally binding. England and Wales: not legally binding — register separately.

Humanist marriages have been legally binding in Scotland since 2005 and in Northern Ireland since 2018. In England and Wales they are not: a couple marrying humanistically there registers the marriage separately. The UK Government announced in October 2025 that it intends to give them legal recognition as part of wider marriage reform; the law has not changed yet, so verify the current position before you book.

Secular vow texts

Complete wording with no religious content. Each is written to sit around the required sentences above rather than to replace them.

The standard secular vow

Civil ceremony · the default

I, N., take you, N., to be my wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, for as long as we both shall live.

The traditional vow with the religious clauses removed: “according to God's holy ordinance” and the troth line are gone, and “till death do us part” has become “for as long as we both shall live.” This is what most registrars and civil celebrants offer first.

The short civil vow

Courthouse or register office · under 20 seconds

I choose you, and I promise to be honest with you, to care for you in poor health and in good, and to stay beside you for the rest of my life.

Written for a booked ten-minute slot. Nothing in it will be cut for time.

The humanist form

Secular · witnesses named rather than a deity

Before everyone I love, and of my own free will, I take you to be my husband. I promise to be honest with you, patient with you, and faithful to you. I will share what I have and carry what you cannot. This is my promise, made freely and meant absolutely.

Where a religious vow calls God as witness, a humanist one calls the people in the room. That substitution — “before these people I love” in place of “before God” — is the single change that turns most religious vow wording secular.

The affirmation, without the word vow

Secular · for couples uneasy with vow language

I am not swearing an oath to anyone. I am telling you, in front of the people who matter to us, what I intend: to be truthful with you, to be kind to you, and to stay. I take you as my partner in this, for the rest of my life.

Some couples object to “vow” on the grounds that it implies an oath sworn to something. This form makes a declaration instead, which is also, in most jurisdictions, exactly what the law is asking for.

A vow with no reference to death

Secular · avoiding “till death do us part”

From today, for all the days I am given, I will be your closest ally and your most honest friend. I will not go quiet on you, I will not keep score, and I will not leave. Everything I have is yours.

“For as long as we both shall live” carries the same weight without the word. Avoid conditional endings such as “for as long as our love lasts” unless you have thought hard about it: guests hear the escape clause instantly.

A vow for a second marriage

Secular · where children are present

I take you as my wife, and I take on gladly everything that comes with you. [Name] and [name] — I will not try to be someone you already have. I will be here, I will be on your side, and I will listen. That is what I am promising, to all three of you.

The commonest reason couples want non-traditional wording is that the traditional text does not acknowledge anybody but the two of them. Naming the children is the change that matters; never make a promise about their other parent.

A vow that names no deity but keeps the cadence

Secular · traditional rhythm

I take you to be my wife, from this day forward, for better and for worse, in plenty and in want, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, for as long as we both shall live. This is my solemn promise, and I make it before everyone here.

For couples who want the ceremonial weight of the old wording without the theology. It keeps the paired clauses and the archaic cadence and simply drops the religious lines.

Making religious wording secular

“Before God” →: “Before everyone I love” · “in front of the people who made us both” · “before these witnesses.” This one substitution does most of the work.
“With God’s help” →: “With everything I have” · “as well as I am able” · “and I will keep trying when I fail at it.” Keep the admission of difficulty — that is what the original clause was doing.
“Holy estate of matrimony” →: “Marriage.” Nothing is lost. Most secular ceremonies overwrite this phrase with something equally ornate; plain is better.
“Till death do us part” →: “For as long as we both shall live” · “for all the days of my life.” Both are secular already; neither is a softening.

One direction that catches couples out: in England and Wales, a civil ceremony may not contain religious content — no hymns, no scripture, no prayers. If you want a reading with a religious line in it, that belongs in a blessing afterwards, not in the ceremony that marries you.

For the full exchange with the officiant’s lines, see wedding vows scripts. For religious wording by tradition, see religious wedding vows.

Common questions

What words are legally required at a wedding?: It depends on the country. In England and Wales, two sentences set by the Marriage Act 1949 must be spoken. In most of the United States no particular form is required at all — New York's statute says so explicitly — but the couple must declare their consent in front of the officiant and the required witnesses.
Can we have a wedding with no religious content at all?: In a civil ceremony, yes, and in England and Wales you must: the law prohibits religious content in a civil marriage, including hymns and readings from scripture. That restriction runs the other way from what most couples expect — it is the civil ceremony that is policed, not the religious one.
What do you say at a courthouse wedding?: Usually very little. The officiant asks whether you take each other, you answer, and it is done. Most courthouse and register-office slots are booked in ten- or fifteen-minute blocks, so bring a short vow if you want one and expect anything long to be trimmed.
Are humanist weddings legally binding?: In Scotland and Northern Ireland, yes. In England and Wales, as of August 2026, they are not — a couple marrying humanistically there still registers the marriage separately at a register office. The UK Government announced in October 2025 that it intends to recognise them as part of wider marriage reform, but the law has not yet changed.
What can we say instead of “till death do us part”?: “For as long as we both shall live” is the standard secular substitute and keeps the same weight. “For all the days of my life” and “for the rest of my life” both work. Avoid open-ended phrasing like “for as long as our love lasts” unless you mean it — guests hear the difference immediately.